I have seen this 'bottling of grievances' before and, from my experience, I think it often comes from this irrational desire of having the outside world perceive your relationship as 'perfect'. And, I don't blame people for feeling this way. I think as a society we haven't normalized that romantic relationships are difficult and full of ups-and-downs. It is very taboo to talk about arguments, the dissipation of passion, betrayals, etc., yet all of these things are extremely common.
Hadn't thought about the lack of normalizing the difficult sides of a relationship, but it's such a valid point. I think about everything we've been fed about relationships through movies, books, etc.—it's all about the courting process and finding the person, but rarely about all the complexity that comes afterward. The movIe "Marriage Story" is a wonderful example oF the former, if you haven't seen it!
OMG -- you are totally reading my mind. I was just talking to a friend about this movie last week and about how much I want to see it. I've seen the argument scene, which is heartbreaking, but haven't seen the full thing yet. I defintiely will soon! Thank you for the recommendation :)
I have seen this 'bottling of grievances' before and, from my experience, I think it often comes from this irrational desire of having the outside world perceive your relationship as 'perfect'. And, I don't blame people for feeling this way. I think as a society we haven't normalized that romantic relationships are difficult and full of ups-and-downs. It is very taboo to talk about arguments, the dissipation of passion, betrayals, etc., yet all of these things are extremely common.
Hadn't thought about the lack of normalizing the difficult sides of a relationship, but it's such a valid point. I think about everything we've been fed about relationships through movies, books, etc.—it's all about the courting process and finding the person, but rarely about all the complexity that comes afterward. The movIe "Marriage Story" is a wonderful example oF the former, if you haven't seen it!
OMG -- you are totally reading my mind. I was just talking to a friend about this movie last week and about how much I want to see it. I've seen the argument scene, which is heartbreaking, but haven't seen the full thing yet. I defintiely will soon! Thank you for the recommendation :)