I can literally feel the breeze off the lake & smell the summer foliage from your description - truly a dream. I relate to the privilege of temporary living as I’ve been able to spend seasons in some amazing places, summertime always holding the most cherished memories. Life can be dark and heavy (understatement of the year) & we all are worthy of coming up for air when needed.
Wanted to comment about the teenager’s story as it resonates with me. The system is chronically flawed, even during the times when resources are being administered and it appears as though people are doing their due diligence, which I appreciate the article pointing out. I give much respect to Grace and Charisse for their determined efforts, although what choice do they have at this point? As a newer therapist, I have seen first hand how damaging institutions are to children/adolescents, they are used as punishment but are advertised as “rehabilitating” how confusing!! Whether they struggle with mental illness or not, most will meet symptom criteria for PTSD by the time they are ‘out’. Mental health, especially that which impacts behavior (aggression, defiance), is feared instead of nurtured which unfortunately just perpetuates the underlying issues. And don’t get me started on race disparity in these institutions !!!!!!! I could go on and on and on but, thanks for including this & speaking on mental health in general.
Holl - your comics are the new highlight to my week... I mean my week isn’t all that exciting at the moment, but nonetheless you are a STAR. Fun tip from your neighborhood therapist for bedtime anxiety: play the ‘categories game’ to keep your mind busy instead. Think of a topic (the more challenging the better) and go down the alphabet: i.e. Bands - Aerosmith, the Beatles, Cheetah Girls ;), etc. Tell anxiety she ain’t welcome in the bedroom.
My favorite summer was when I was younger and we rented a house in New Jersey on the boardwalk. It was my best summer there were rides and the beach and the boardwalk and all my siblings to play with it rose like paradise I don't never forget that summer
“It’s an alternate universe, I think, one which will continue to exist after I leave, one that is not defined by my presence in its orbit. And I keep thinking that maybe, hopefully, I can borrow from it, that I can bottle up this sense of vitality and peace and infuse them into my existence, after.”
OOF. Does anyone else feel this way about...life as a whole? There are moments that seem to drag on for eternity, where so much of my identity is consumed and defined by a current situation or dynamic, but then there are those eclipses of time and space and identity and it seems as though I’m hyper aware of life’s fleeting nature and of my own insignificance in it all. Allowing ourselves to be transformed by the experience, to be vulnerable and open enough to be changed...I truly think that’s how we as humans dance with the universe. There is only so much we can do—desire, will, and sheer grit are essential, don’t get me wrong. But I’ve always felt that the real magic happens when we allow ourselves to be immersed in those experiences that flow through us, seeing and respecting them as their own entity while also absorbing their energy and being brave enough to be transformed in the process.
Holy fuck these comics I FEEL SO SEEN. It’s been a while since I’ve had a late night anxiety session (mine tend to visit me in fits and spurts throughout the day now...maybe they’re scared of the dark like I am). Nevertheless, it’s still like looking in a mirror. I wasted several precious minutes of my day yesterday wondering how an insignificant joke I made was perceived. Also, something about the details that Hol includes in these comfort me. The shorts on the ground, the necklace hanging in the shelf, the mug of tea. Thanks for giving us a peep into what it’s like to be in your head.
So much of this week's newsletter resonated with me. I often feel like the pull of my phone/social media is distracting me from my 'real life.' I am appalled by the teenager who is in juvenile detention for not doing her homework (and as a parent, so concerned about what this upcoming school year will bring). I am perplexed/appalled by how wealthy (and stingy!) Jeff Bezos is- it is mind boggling. And I also lie awake at night wondering a lot of the same things (awesome job, Holly!). Loved this so much.
This was so nice to read! Thank you for describing it so eloquently! I have to say these comments are beautiful books of their own and I’ve been a little hesitant to comment as well as I’m not sure I can hold a candle to anything that’s already been said! But then I remembered, That’s not what this forum about. Like you said and like this newsletter puts, it’s about starting conversation and I must say your newsletters have been such great conversation starters for me! I also had the experience this summer of living at the beach for a month and a half and it felt like an entirely different world completely. I would meander to town, pick up some fruit, bike back and decide if I wanted to swim or read in the hammock. It feels like an different universe now that I’m back in Brooklyn, the space is smaller, I’m posting more on my phone like you mentioned and It makes me wonder if the correlation between social media and the desire to be seen is heightened when we feel most alone or uncomfortable. Last night I posted a picture of the Brooklyn Bridge, my first night back in Brooklyn, a scene I have captured so many times and I’m sure my followers are tired of seeing. But all those nights at the beach and I never posted a single photo of the crashing waves, didn’t try to describe the smell of the salt or the warmth of family.
I also really relate to your pain situation. I have chronic pain and I noticed a significant difference in my pain when I am in a more relaxed environment. I like what you said about taking aspects of this alternative reality and bringing it into the ‘real’ world. It’s so hard right now though to imagine what the real world is given the state of everyone’s existence. I was talking to my friend about it last night and she’s just sort of been a floater during this time since she lost her job, shifting from family home to family home in all parts of the country. And with each space comes a different experience / reality. Anyway I’ll stop rambling but thanks for the thought provoking peace! Have a great rest of the all American summer!
Living somewhere new, even if temporary definitely doesn’t mean a vacation. I had to explain this to so many people when I was an exchange student. Even though I was having new experiences, it didn’t mean that the pressures and worries of every day life didn’t effect me. I also felt so free to do what I wanted to do while abroad. I didn’t have a phone and the wifi was always spotty so doing things for social media was not a thing. Sounds like you are on your own countryside exchange 😉
You are living how I grew up. Enjoy the peace and quiet. Cities are forever overrated. I loved my rural lifestyle and have lived my life searching for a way to get it back and have my career.
If you have figured it out, kudos to you! Hope you are well.
I can literally feel the breeze off the lake & smell the summer foliage from your description - truly a dream. I relate to the privilege of temporary living as I’ve been able to spend seasons in some amazing places, summertime always holding the most cherished memories. Life can be dark and heavy (understatement of the year) & we all are worthy of coming up for air when needed.
Wanted to comment about the teenager’s story as it resonates with me. The system is chronically flawed, even during the times when resources are being administered and it appears as though people are doing their due diligence, which I appreciate the article pointing out. I give much respect to Grace and Charisse for their determined efforts, although what choice do they have at this point? As a newer therapist, I have seen first hand how damaging institutions are to children/adolescents, they are used as punishment but are advertised as “rehabilitating” how confusing!! Whether they struggle with mental illness or not, most will meet symptom criteria for PTSD by the time they are ‘out’. Mental health, especially that which impacts behavior (aggression, defiance), is feared instead of nurtured which unfortunately just perpetuates the underlying issues. And don’t get me started on race disparity in these institutions !!!!!!! I could go on and on and on but, thanks for including this & speaking on mental health in general.
Holl - your comics are the new highlight to my week... I mean my week isn’t all that exciting at the moment, but nonetheless you are a STAR. Fun tip from your neighborhood therapist for bedtime anxiety: play the ‘categories game’ to keep your mind busy instead. Think of a topic (the more challenging the better) and go down the alphabet: i.e. Bands - Aerosmith, the Beatles, Cheetah Girls ;), etc. Tell anxiety she ain’t welcome in the bedroom.
Can’t wait for next week!!!
Jess
My favorite summer was when I was younger and we rented a house in New Jersey on the boardwalk. It was my best summer there were rides and the beach and the boardwalk and all my siblings to play with it rose like paradise I don't never forget that summer
“It’s an alternate universe, I think, one which will continue to exist after I leave, one that is not defined by my presence in its orbit. And I keep thinking that maybe, hopefully, I can borrow from it, that I can bottle up this sense of vitality and peace and infuse them into my existence, after.”
OOF. Does anyone else feel this way about...life as a whole? There are moments that seem to drag on for eternity, where so much of my identity is consumed and defined by a current situation or dynamic, but then there are those eclipses of time and space and identity and it seems as though I’m hyper aware of life’s fleeting nature and of my own insignificance in it all. Allowing ourselves to be transformed by the experience, to be vulnerable and open enough to be changed...I truly think that’s how we as humans dance with the universe. There is only so much we can do—desire, will, and sheer grit are essential, don’t get me wrong. But I’ve always felt that the real magic happens when we allow ourselves to be immersed in those experiences that flow through us, seeing and respecting them as their own entity while also absorbing their energy and being brave enough to be transformed in the process.
Holy fuck these comics I FEEL SO SEEN. It’s been a while since I’ve had a late night anxiety session (mine tend to visit me in fits and spurts throughout the day now...maybe they’re scared of the dark like I am). Nevertheless, it’s still like looking in a mirror. I wasted several precious minutes of my day yesterday wondering how an insignificant joke I made was perceived. Also, something about the details that Hol includes in these comfort me. The shorts on the ground, the necklace hanging in the shelf, the mug of tea. Thanks for giving us a peep into what it’s like to be in your head.
Love to you all!
So much of this week's newsletter resonated with me. I often feel like the pull of my phone/social media is distracting me from my 'real life.' I am appalled by the teenager who is in juvenile detention for not doing her homework (and as a parent, so concerned about what this upcoming school year will bring). I am perplexed/appalled by how wealthy (and stingy!) Jeff Bezos is- it is mind boggling. And I also lie awake at night wondering a lot of the same things (awesome job, Holly!). Loved this so much.
This was so nice to read! Thank you for describing it so eloquently! I have to say these comments are beautiful books of their own and I’ve been a little hesitant to comment as well as I’m not sure I can hold a candle to anything that’s already been said! But then I remembered, That’s not what this forum about. Like you said and like this newsletter puts, it’s about starting conversation and I must say your newsletters have been such great conversation starters for me! I also had the experience this summer of living at the beach for a month and a half and it felt like an entirely different world completely. I would meander to town, pick up some fruit, bike back and decide if I wanted to swim or read in the hammock. It feels like an different universe now that I’m back in Brooklyn, the space is smaller, I’m posting more on my phone like you mentioned and It makes me wonder if the correlation between social media and the desire to be seen is heightened when we feel most alone or uncomfortable. Last night I posted a picture of the Brooklyn Bridge, my first night back in Brooklyn, a scene I have captured so many times and I’m sure my followers are tired of seeing. But all those nights at the beach and I never posted a single photo of the crashing waves, didn’t try to describe the smell of the salt or the warmth of family.
I also really relate to your pain situation. I have chronic pain and I noticed a significant difference in my pain when I am in a more relaxed environment. I like what you said about taking aspects of this alternative reality and bringing it into the ‘real’ world. It’s so hard right now though to imagine what the real world is given the state of everyone’s existence. I was talking to my friend about it last night and she’s just sort of been a floater during this time since she lost her job, shifting from family home to family home in all parts of the country. And with each space comes a different experience / reality. Anyway I’ll stop rambling but thanks for the thought provoking peace! Have a great rest of the all American summer!
Living somewhere new, even if temporary definitely doesn’t mean a vacation. I had to explain this to so many people when I was an exchange student. Even though I was having new experiences, it didn’t mean that the pressures and worries of every day life didn’t effect me. I also felt so free to do what I wanted to do while abroad. I didn’t have a phone and the wifi was always spotty so doing things for social media was not a thing. Sounds like you are on your own countryside exchange 😉
Love your stories you're the best
You are living how I grew up. Enjoy the peace and quiet. Cities are forever overrated. I loved my rural lifestyle and have lived my life searching for a way to get it back and have my career.
If you have figured it out, kudos to you! Hope you are well.